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Myth: The Personal Statement is a way to show colleges that you are ready for academic, scholarly writing.
Fact: The Personal Statement helps colleges see what kind of person you’ll be in their community, so they want to see your authentic self.
That’s why you want to use your authentic voice when writing any college essay.
So what’s the problem? A student has shared an essay draft with me, whether it’s a personal statement or a supplemental (college-specific) essay. Maybe we’ve gone back and forth a number of times, and I’ve seen real growth and development in their writing. The student is addressing the prompt, and the style and tone is light and casual. Then somehow, the next version I see is different. Conversational words are gone, replaced by what you might expect from doctors, lawyers or parents!
It’s crucial for students to write essays in an authentic voice, as if they are speaking with the admissions reader (as opposed to a peer, so there’s no unacceptable slang or foul language). The essay sounds like the student because the student is the author. It flows like a delightful conversation, free of fluffy words and phrases, which make the essay harder to get through and may even make the reader question who wrote it—or was it AI? Take a look at the table below for examples of forced, unnatural words and phrases versus natural sentences in authentic voice.
You Forced... | You could have said . . . |
---|---|
From my only seventeen short years of living, I can truly attest to the fact that putting yourself out there and getting involved is the best way to make the most out of life. | Why not put myself out there? It’s worked so far! |
XYZ University’s values of truth, unity and love are aligned to my passion for learning. | I like the idea that I can create my own major. At XYZ University, I would be able to put together a program that brings together my interests in [subject] and [another subject]. |
I’m drawn to the competitive placement, study-abroad programs and experienced faculty who are advocates for learning. | On my tour, I heard that XYZ has very helpful counselors at the Campbell Career Center. I’m also excited to do research with professors and study in your program in Florence. |
I’m inspired to join the highly rated College of Foreign Service because I think this is a school that embodies the values that are important to me. | I would love to be a diplomat and help tackle issues like hunger and immigration that are important around the world. Studying at the College of Foreign Service would help make that a reality. |
I became the best version of myself. | Nothing. Your examples speak for themselves. |